Thursday, December 31, 2009

Top Ten Apocalyptic Movies of the 00's - Miss War

It's been quite the decade-o-disaster at the multiplex my friends.  We Horsewomen do so enjoy a good apocalypse, even if Hollywood is often wrong about, well just about ever detail of the apocalypse.  So we thought we'd show our appreciation for our favorite homages to our work at this, the close of the first decade of the 21rst Century:

First... the quality entries...

28 Days Later - An indie-drama masquerading as a zombie flick, Danny Boyle's entry into the zombie-pocalypse genre is terrifying on a lot of levels. Plus, Cilian Murphy is hot, even without hair. Need we say more?

Wall-E - An apocalyptic-kids movie! Say what you will about Pixar - they've got balls of steal. Who would have thought that you could start indoctrinating the populous to look forward to the joys of the apocalypse at such a young age? Pixar has managed it though.  According to them the apocalypse features the cutest robots EVER and a lot of problems that can mostly be solved by eating right and exercising. Oh, and a tensy garbage problem.  We Horsewomen approve of exercising, eating right AND recycling, so we call this one a winner.

Children of Men - A dreary, dreary sort of apocalypse, but a pretty damn good movie.  We'll appreciate it as art and be happy that our apocalypse isn't NEARLY this grungy. Famine would never stand for it.

Sunshine - Danny Boyle explores a different, quieter sort of apocalypse in this psychological thriller about the crew sent to try to reignite the sun before the Earth freezes. The crew might self destruct - but will they be in time to prevent the death of our sun? If you've seen it, you know, if you haven't... that's not my fault, is it?

Shawn of the Dead - Putting the ha-ha in zombie attacks, this British slice of hilarity changed the name of the game when it came to horror. With a healthy dose of really great action, big scares and a few true heart strings playing moments this is a mish-mash that just works.

Cloverfield - This little movie would merit a place on this even if it's only accomplishment was being the only "hand-held" movie that hasn't made me physically ill.  I know, I know, harbinger of doom, bringer of peril, destroyer of worlds and what's my kryptonite? Shaky camera work. I'm ashamed of myself too. Beyond not being sea-sick inducing, this charming little, never quite see the monster movie manages to be fun, effective and entertaining.  The cast might be a little on the mediocre side, but it kept this Horsewoman happy for a couple of hours, so we'll accept it into our visions of the apocalypse hall of fame.

And for the cheese ball half of the list....

Land of the Dead - George A. Romero, king of the zombie movies, investigates what might happen after a zombie apocalypse in this sequel. Simon Baker is hot, the zombie hookers are gross and life after the end of it all seems like good, if a little dirty, fun. A girl can always count on Mr. Romero for a good time!

The Day After Tomorrow - Mr. Emmerich took two stabs at the apoca-genre this decade, but we're just going to pretend that The Day After Tomorrow stands alone as a representative of his work because that other movie (you know the one I'm talking about, starts with 20, ends with 12) is TERRIBLE.  Is this the best of his work? No. Is this the best apocalypse movie he's ever made? No. But no list of apocalyptic movies can be complete without an entry from Mr. Emmerich, so we've made room on the list.

I Am Legend - And in the category of movies that should have been better... We like to watch this movie for the movie it was before it was re-written via post-shoot editing.  Do you REALLY think you've convinced us that the zombie king is willing to chase his girl out into the sunlight because he's becoming LESS human? Really? But, post-focus group re-editing or not, it stars Mr. Will Smith, our number one action hero with whom to survive an apocalypse, so it belongs on our list!

Battlefield Earth - Last but certainly not least, the WORST apocalypse movie, perhaps ever. This gem goes so far beyond bad that it is kind of a fabulous apocalypse in itself.  The fact that's it's based on a religious text? Well, just icing on the cake.

That's the decade in apocali looks like ladies and gentleman. Go forth and be merry, for the end is, as always, nigh.

Get out 2009! And NEVER come back! - 4HW


Ok. So here’s the deal.  December was a busy month for the Four Horsewomen.  Yes, I know, “It’s a busy month for everyone.” But it’s particularly busy for us.  It involves certain…rituals…and preparations.  Traditionally, December is a VERY important month in the Apocalypse (hint hint). I mean, first there was that whole UFO over the Kremlin incident. African pythons decided to make Florida their new home (hey – who knew African pythons were retired New Yorkers?).  Jake Gyllenhaal didn’t keep up his end of our Apocalyptic Bargain.  And let’s not forget the Annual Horsewomen Holiday Retreat. (Yes, that’s right. We’ll admit it. We slacked off on our duties to go spend a few weeks in St. Lucia.  What? You didn’t spend a week or two knocking back eggnogs with your nearest and dearest in your family hovels? We Horsewomen just have different priorities, that’s all.  And Miss Conquest LOVES her rum.)

But just because we’re complete and total slackers doesn’t mean we don’t want jump on the Best of the Decade bandwagon as we happily kick 2009 out the window (good riddance!) and make way for 2010.  After all, the Aughts were nothing if not Apocalyptic.  (The tanking economy won 500 points for Gryffindor alone.)

So check back often as we look at some of the best Apocalyptic Fashion Disasters, Apocalyptic Celebrity Couples, movies, books and songs of the decade, and tune in to find out who we name as THE Honorary Horsewomen of the decade!

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Copenhagen in a Nutshell of CO2 - Miss Death

I realize that I spend the majority of my time covering fashion and celebs, but I do have a brain inside this perfectly manicured skull. And from time to time, I like to use it. So today's recap will be a quick overview of the Copenhagen Conference on Global and Climate Change. Sounds fun, right? Stay with me....

In 2012, the Kyoto Protocal will expire. The Kyoto Protocol was put in place to create "binding limits" on the amount of CO2 that a country can emit. (Eh hem...that includes you, China.) So, in short, once the Kyoto Protocol expires, without a new protocol in place to stop countries from going hog wild and producing all the CO2 emissions they like, you are all screwed.

Not me. I'm already dead. It's sort of my thing.

Government reps from 170 countries will meet to duke it out over the new standards for carbon emissions. Sounds great, right? Except for that fact that this years Copehagen Summit will produce the largest carbon footprint of any summit to date.

Between travel, work and flights this summit will produce 46,200 tonnes of carbon emissions. That is "enough to fill 10,000 swimming pools" and is equivalent to the same amount produced by 2,600 Americans IN A YEAR. (Run away, little penguin! Run!)

1 step forward, 2 steps back. It's a deadly waltz we dance. But who am I to complain. Business for me is booming and the outlook on my industry is high. So keep up the great work, Copenhagen. We'll be headed for the next apocalypse in no time!

Signing off for now darlings! (No worries, I'll be back with more updates on pretty, frilly, sparkley things next time.)

I'll get off my high horse for now. (Her name is Shiela.)

Monday, December 7, 2009

Apocalyptic Website of the Week: There, I Fixed It! - Miss Famine

We’ve had many signs of the Apocalypse lately.  There are lots of terrible and horrible things that we need to warn you about - things that are trying their darndest to usher in the End of Days.  So many things in fact, that we’ve been neglecting our OTHER duties – helping you, teaching you, guiding you through this crazy apocalyptic wave.  (It’s right there in the title, folks!)

That’s why I’d like to bring this FANTASTIC WEBSITE to your attention today. Our resources are sometimes limited here in Armageddon, and because of that, we sometimes have to get a little MacGyver-y. (NOT the same as getting Maverick-y, FYI.)  And this website has it all. Helpful tips with a hilarious edge.  Fix your problems AND laugh them off at the same time! is practically a how-to guide for household problems.  What DO you do when you just can’t find a wrench to save your life? (No. Seriously.  Save your life.  The other day my faucet started leaking… but it wasn’t just water… there were blood-sucking alien leeches IN the water… I needed a wrench. STAT.).

So just HOW does solve all of your pesky problems....?

Say I used everything - including the kitchen sink - to barricade my hovel during a zombie attack.  Now what in Hades do I use for a sink?!?!

 Oh. That.

I’m having a party, but last week I used my silver bottle opener to take out a frisky werewolf.  Now how do I serve drinks?


I need to make a quick getaway from a tidal wave that’s about to wash away my hovel… But as luck would have it, I have a flat tire!!! WHAT DO I DO!?!

Luckily, there are children near by playing in a park. And I have no moral qualms about stealing toys from children at all whatsoever.

My kids are all crazy messed up in the future and I need to get use the Time Machine ASAP to stop them from effing everything up (even though this premise makes no sense in terms of urgency or stakes), but the Zombies stole all of my Plutonium!!!  How the heck do I make my Time Machine fly??

“Roads? Where we’re going, we don’t NEED roads…”  Just corn.

And those are just a few of the handy tips from This site is like the Bob Villa of the Apocalypse! Visit today!

*All photos are from the super handy, and super hilarious blog. 

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Human v. Zombie: People, this is NOT a game! -Miss Conquest

What is this bullshit? Have we not spread the warnings? Have you not seen what happens when you toy with the undead? Clearly no one is taking this seriously. (hangs head in frustration) (withered sigh)

College kids have given up on the ever popular sports of Frisbee Golf and Drinking Til You Pass Out With No Pants and are instead taking up the new game of Humans v. Zombies. The teams are divided up (like Sharks and Fishes) and players take turns "fighting" one another in a tag-like setting using Nerf guns.

Are you shitting me? Nerf guns.

Why not just hit them with pillows and balloons? Perhaps you could just blow kisses at them?

Government test labs the world over have been harvesting all sorts of zombie-creating diseases. Hell, even Lady Gaga wants to be a zombie ("I want your ugly, I want your disease.") But to make a game of this in some light hearted attempt at irony is just reinforcing the notion that college kids are idiots and the world is not taking this zombie epidemic seriously enough.

"We must stop these college jerks from trivializing the threat of the undead." - Stephen Colbert (political commentator, human sympathizer).

Sure! It's all fun and games until you find yourself face to face with a real zombie, and all you have to defend yourself is a Nerf Big Bad Titan, which fires foam darts at a speed of .002 mph. At that speed, you could walk over and kick them in the nuts faster. Long story short, you're a dead man. 

People. I implore you. Do NOT partake in this mindless game. It perpetuates false stereotypes about the severity of this deadly disease (Zombitis). Nerf guns will not save you, you silly-nancys. While the girls and I are out fighting off REAL zombies every. single. day. you jerktards are out skipping through wildflower fields throwing foam darts at one another.

Thank you, Mr. Colbert, for giving this game your highest threat level warning. At least someone is taking this seriously.
As Stephen Colbert so perfectly put it: "Hey college kids, stop playing fake zombies and get back to what you are supposed to be doing. Playing fake lesbians and fake vegetarians."

Don't say we didn't warn you.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Know Your Place on the Menu - Miss Famine

I am STUFFED.  The girls and I had a flawless Thanksgiving this year. (Only two zombie attacks and only one smoke detector incident.  Death is officially banned from the kitchen.)  We were all a little anxious leading up to the big event -- would Thanksgiving still be the same in the Apocalypse?  Would friends and family still gather and shovel food into their faces until they couldn't breath?  Would that weird uncle still be super awkward? Would the turkey rise from the dead as Zombie turkey?!

Yes! Yes! And sort of. (No worries. Zombie Turkeys are just as easy to cook and just as tasty as regular turkeys.  Just bite them before they bite you.)

I was so relieved that all of the the tradition is still firmly in tact, and we're now gearing up for a very merry Holiday season.  The girls and I even went shopping early on Black Friday.  It's so much less scary when you come prepared with your pretty machetes and pearl handled revolversCompetitive shoppers just leap out of your way.

But now that that's over, we're facing the scariest of all post-Thanksgiving traditions... LEFTOVERS.  Leftovers have always been a little risky -- How long does this all last? The green beans are moving, should I stop eating? Is the stuffing ok if it's congealed, white, and fuzzy? How many pieces of pie is too many to eat in one sitting?  (The answer is 7.  Just trust me.)

And ever since that apocalypse hit, we've had even more to worry about, like...when do WE become the leftovers?

Oh. That's when.

Happy Zombgiving, Everyone!

Miss Famine

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Finally! A Narrative on Why Everything Goes to Shit During a Zombie Apocalypse - Miss Conquest

I've been saying it for years, folks. This is no one's fault but your own. I didn't start the zombie apocalypse. I merely encouraged what had already been set into motion. And, as friend and neighbor to many zombies, I really can't help but sympathize with them.

Finally. Someone printed the totally accurate narrative of how the Zombie Apoc came to be. The next time you feel frisky, why not hold off on getting cocky with the disease hybrid meatloaf. See below for further explanation.

Not here.


Friday, November 20, 2009




The end is so freakishly near you can taste it!

Mmm.  Tastes like chicken.

"New Moon Sets All-time Midnight Record"

It beat Harry Potter.

It beat Dark Knight.

 Batman, bested by a bare chested 12-year-old.  I guess the chicks just don't dig Teflon as much as they used to.

It made $26.27 MILLION DOLLARS.

And that's just the kick-off.  Reports are that the sequel may break the all-time opening day records, while simultaneously attracting earthquakes, birds, snakes, and aeroplanes, effectively ending the world as we know it.

Didja see THIS coming, Michael Stipe.  Didja? Didja?!

What is this business with Twilight vamps not having fangs?  I don't buy it.  They just took the biggest bite out of our collective Hello Kitty pocket book ever (during witching hours, at least).  Oh well, I guess it's true what they say about whiskey and vampires... totally Recession-proof.

"Honey.  Hey. Wake up.  Did you drink all my moonshine?"

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Cha-Ching. New Moon's Predicted Fortune Spells A-P-O-C-A-L-Y-P-S-E. -Miss War

If there's one thing we Horsewomen do well, it's spot signs of the coming Apocalypse.  We're like rangers that way.  We sense danger. We can smell it in the sulfuric air.

And there's no better place to find signs than THE ALL KNOWING BOX OFFICE. (At least for me. I know Death likes to frequent department stores and fashion shows while sign watching.) 

And guys and ghouls, boy do we have a whopping sign flashing at us today:

Twilight Saga: New Moon looking at a $104.2 million opening weekend.


Three. Tiny. Little. Days. 

Not even a HOLIDAY weekend.

How, you ask, might a movie about a lip-biting girl and a sparkly vampire cause the world to scream "AH!" and just throw fistfuls of dollars at Summit Entertainment like the company was a high class stripper played by Christina Aguilera or Kristen Bell?

Is it Robert Pattinson's cocky coif?

Is it Kristen Stewart's sighing and throat clearing?

Is it Taylor Lautner's magic miracle grow abs?

Is it the "Forbidden Bad Boy loves me but doesn't make a move no matter how much I throw my naked body willingly and desperately onto his fangless lap" fantasy? (It only makes us want him more.)

There must be SOMETHING in Stephanie Meyers' Mormon Vegitarian Vampire tale that makes us swoon in unison. 

SOMETHING that's going to drive 13-year-old girls to the theater six or seven times before SATURDAY (and by 13-year-old girls, I mean myself, Death, Famine, Conquest, my sister, my mom, my best friend, the zombie-lady who lives next door, my alien boss, Nkchbu).

I'm going to make a wild accusation about what's behind this whole unsettling shebang (even though the movie contains NO banging of the she or he variety at all whatsoever).  Now bear with me.  It makes sense if you think about it:

Kristen Stewart and Stephanie Meyer sold their souls to the Devil.

I know, I know, I hear you.  "But Miss War.  Shouldn't that only affect THEM? How does it cause the Apocalypse?"

Duh.  Devil.  He likes to end the world even more than WE do.

So why am I not including RobPat or TayLaut in this little apocalyptic pact?

Cause let's face it, they're just eye candy.  We loves us some female gaze, yes we do. 

So, let me be the first to say it (who are we kidding... I'm like the 47th), when the title "New Moon" is suddenly tossed in with the likes of such family friendly, get-butts-in-the-seats titles as, "Spider Man," "Pirates of the Caribbean," "HARRY EFFING POTTER," run for the farthest hills and dig yourself a bloody bomb shelter, because the End is fucking NEAR.

*Don't believe me?  There have been 18,834 updated Tweets with the tag #newmoon since I started this post. 18,938.  20,103.


Monday, November 16, 2009

Journey, The Most Apocalyptic Band of all Time

This is a short post. Simply put, the best song of all time, the song we played and sang along to while raining fire and brimstone...the song that makes me equal parts happy and sad when I sing it...the song that never EVER gets old or boring or overplayed....has just been covered by Fox's Glee during season 1 and like a really good disease outbreak, the more you share it, the better this gets.

So plug in your apoc headphones, get out your lighter and crank this mother to 11.

Ride the Midnight Train here and don't let your coworkers see you sobbing like a baby while you mouth along with then words.

Also, give the cover of Billy Idol's "Dancing with Myself" a go. Long story short, you'll shamelessly chair dance with yourself.

Friday, November 13, 2009

Stand up for a Friday the 13th Near You! - Miss Conquest

I'm MAD and I'm not going to take it any more.  What,, you ask?  There's so much to choose from...


And lets not forget about...


But fashion offenses are nothing compared to the injustice I speak of today.  That's right.


Or... to sum up...

Each and every month that begins with Sunday include a Friday that lies on the 13th day on the month.  Friday the 13th. I was born, some, unspecified not toooo long a time ago in the past, on Friday the 13th.  I am charming and lovely and a joy to all who know me.  But, when Friday the 13th comes around, all of my gracious qualities are forgotten by datists who choose to percicute those of us who originate on this particular day.

Calendar discrimination has long and pernicious roots.  Even the ancient Babylonians practiced this unfortunate and unreasonable prejudice against this innocent number. That means this prejudice has been around since at least 1700 BC.  But, it didn't really take off until this guy:


Wrote a completely fictional book that has ruined this wonderful day for all of us called, you guessed it -- Friday the Thirteenth.

Thanks, asshole.

Today, the third Friday the 13th of 2009, I've decided to take a stand.  Our voice deserves to be heard! The first Thirteen Club was started 1881 and boasted a membership that included five presidents.  It's time to bring this venerable institution back.  Join me in fighting back against triskaidekaphobia in all of it's forms! 

Join the cause - walk under a ladder or pet a black cat today!


Just a reminder... - Miss War


Hey you.

Yeah, you.

Come here.

I'm not sure if I've mentioned this before, but... 

It's here.

That's all.

Check back Monday for an accuracy report.  (My guess is not very... I heard there weren't even Zombies.  Psh.)

Happy Friday the 13th,
Miss War

Friday, November 6, 2009

Bringing About the Apocalypse. You're doing it RIGHT, Messrs. Gyllenhaal and Bruckheimer! - Miss War

Dear Friends,

I know on Fridays I usually preview the exciting (and/or questionable) movin' pictures that will grace the silver screen over the weekend. And this weekend definitely has a full slate of flicks.  Both the good: "Men Who Stare At Goats" and "A Christmas Carol" (just forget the fact that Halloween was barely a week ago), and the others: "The Fourth Kind" and "The Box."

But today I'd like to take a minute to honor a trailer that understands the true meaning of the word "apocalyptic."

And it's not 2012.  

I'm talking about this week's latest buzz-worthy trailer - "Prince of Persia."  (Watch here!)

(* This poster is not a joke.)

The trailer opens with dirty-gold fireworks bursting over Cinderella's Castle set to a dark, brooding score.  This caught my attention. "Pirates 4?  ALREADY? Sweet!"  But no.  All lies.  These explosions aren't from cannon balls.  In fact, I'm still not quite sure what these are supposed to be.

We then fly high above the world of a very dusty and very CGI'd Medieval Persia, and are given an overwrought mythology about a dagger and some time-traveling sand.  Cool. Got it.

But then the trailer lost me.  And it's not because the pervasive narration doesn't explain every. single. plot. beat.  'Cause it does.  No, the trailer lost me here because for the next 2 minutes and 20 seconds I could only see one thing... THAT WIG.

Now, the Apocalypse has not precluded my affinity for the doe-eyed Gyllenhaal in any way shape or form.  I still love him even after he went all Zombie-bot with that chick.  He was adorable in "Bubble Boy". Angsty, mysterious, and HOT in "Donnie Darko."  Apathetic and even HOTTER in "Jarhead."

So when you see the trailer, you'll understand my confusion.  I stopped watching and thought to myself, "What be this creature I see in the moving picture box?  It cannot be the beautiful Jake Gyllenhaal I know and love.  ...Can it?"

No.  No, Mr. Gyllenhaal.  I do not agree.  I will not accept your horribly stitched wig and sprayed-on-looking abs!


Sigh... if this movie doesn't cause the Apocalypse, I don't know what will.  (That's a lie.  I totally know.)

Peace, Love, and Movie Trailers
Miss War

PS:  Because I don't want to be a complete sourpuss, check out the NEW "Avatar" trailer.  Looks just as cool as the first, but this time it actually tells us what the movie's about!

Also, the "Salt" teaser hit the interwebs this week.  Angelina Jolie being badass?  You don't say...

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Bored to Death - Miss War

So. Bored.

So.....soooo....bored. Miss Famine and I were just iming about how bored we were at the MGGtStA Office. Normally, Miss Conquest is a slave driver (her thirst for success in unquenchable) but she's out of the office all week for some pillaging and plundering R&R time.

And thus, we are bored. Also, we are getting to the point of cabin fever where we are indeed annoying one another. If Miss Death drums her boney little fingers one more time, there will be post-apocalyptic hell to pay.

Anywho. I've been surfing the net looking for ways to amuse myself. Short of planning Miss Famine's Future As-Yet-To-Be-Determined Wedding (again), my eyeballs are going to bleed if I don't find a reason to live for the next 4 hours.

I present to Here, you can develop a deeper appreciation for shitty art while learning new things! Like...mushrooms 101! to tend to unsightly hair!

No worries, you can thank me later.

Also, thank YOU Google Reader, for reading my mind and recommending If you like the whimsicall art and handmade designs of Etsy, than you'll love the half-assed attempts at homemade crafts showcased on Regretsy! After all, every DIY project involves a little glue and a whole lotta regret. 

And if all else fails, well, you can reread the Twilight series. Because deep down, everyone is a 14-year old girl.

Keep it real apocalyptic.

Saturday, October 31, 2009

Halloween TV Specials to Make You Howl - Miss War

So it's Halloween afternoon.  I'm whipping up some nuclear pumpkin pie, and a meatloaf femur to take to Miss Famine's party tonight.  I'm putting the finishing touches on my costume (inspired by one of the episodes listed below), and making sure my new Zombie-Radar Gun is all ready to go. (This is a must-have for Halloween Safety - it distinguishes a REAL zombie from a COSTUME zombie).  And to keep my spirits up through all of these last minute errands, I've thrown on some of my FAVORITE Halloween TV episodes.

Let me know if there are any more I should throw into the mix, or if I'm missing YOUR favorite Halloween Special!

The Simpsons - "Treehouse of Horror V"
"At the end of the world, only cockroaches, Twinkies, and The Simpsons will survive."  Ok, so I made that up.  But as we're well past The End Of Days, and the Simpsons are on their TWENTIETH Treehouse of Horror, it feels pretty accurate.  We chose Volume V because of the classic "The Shinning" segment.  ("You have the Shinning, boy!" "Don't you mean the Shining?" "Shh! Do you want to get sued?")

South Park - "Hell on Earth"
No one does Halloween quite like Satan.  And no one does Satan quite like South Park.  Satan throws the biggest Halloween party the world/heaven/hell has ever seen.  Especially when he comes up with something that "Diddy didn't do."

Castle - "Vampire Weekend" 
Despite the fact that this episode aired barely a week ago, and I've already forgotten what the actual mystery was, it's already a classic in my book.  Richard Castle (Nathan Fillion) dressing as a "space cowboy," (aka: his very own cult character, Captain Mal Reynolds from "Firefly") is perhaps one of the most perfect moments of television ever filmed - at least for us Whedon-Geeks.  Throw in the following Buffy nods, and sneaky Dr. Horrible riff, and it was an episode to die for.

Scooby Doo and the Ghoul School

Every time I watch Scooby and Shaggy teach a boarding school of monster daughters, I feel like a little Horsegirl again. So many tricks and treats to be found as the girls of Miss Grimwood's Finishing School for Girls train to kick the boys' butts in a volleyball match.  Now that's some Ghoul Power!

How I Met Your Mother - "Slutty Pumpkin"
There's an old TV myth that says the 6th episode of a series is THE most important episode.  By this point the show has fully come into its own and if it's bad, it's never going to recover. But if it's GOOD, well, then this show is something to pay attention to.  It's very telling that the 6th episode of HIMYM is this highly memorable Slutty Pumpkin episode.  It's hard to tell what's better, Barney dressed as a penguin drinking root beer and Kahlua, or Ted dressed as a "hanging chad." In 2005.

Growing Pains - "Happy Halloween Parts 1 & 2" 
WHY you ask, is this Growing Pains episode on the list? When we think of Growing Pains do we think of frights and scares?  No.  But this episode that features the Seaver family each trying to one up each other with a scary story inspired me in my later years.  This is why the girls and I always try to one up each other with acts of destruction.  Very important in my formative years, you see.

Buffy The Vampire Slayer - "Halloween"
In a series full of horror and monster stories, there are three specifically designated Buffy Halloween episodes. We chose this one because of the clean lines, and simply classic Halloween plot.  Kids dress in cursed costumes.  Turn into said costumes. Scooby Gang saves the day.  It's magically delicious!

Quantum Leap - "The Boogieman"

Sam leaps into a horror novelist (supposedly Little Stevie King's mentor) and is given some bad advice from the Devil masquerading as hologram Al. This episode even comes with its very own Macbeth-esque curse - fans refuse to call it by name, instead referring to it as "The Halloween Episode."

It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown
"There are three things I have learned never to discuss with people: religion, politics, and the Great Pumpkin."  No holiday TV special list is complete without a Peanuts Even in our darkest hours here in the Apocalypse, we an always count on Charlie Brown and friends to make us smile.

And with that, I bid you all a happy, spooky, and safe Halloween.
Miss War

PS: If you haven't guessed it yet, I'm TOTALLY going to be a Slutty Pumpkin tonight.